Keeping Your Man Happy
A friend of ours was in the process of getting a divorce because her husband was cheating on her and I remember her folding clothes saying "Look what I got myself". It was a pair of G-String undeez. I asked her "You've never worn those before?" And she replied "No, but since the divorce I wanted to try something new." All I could think about was...{why didn't you wear that for your man??}
Now please don't think I'm condoning that behavior and don't think I'm putting the blame on her, BUT I do think we as women could work a little harder to keep our man happy.
With that said, here are some things you can do to keep your man looking at you and not someone else.
- CLEAN UP~~Don't wear sweats everyday, put some makeup on, brush your hair, and for goodness sake...don't go around wearing stained t-shirts. Did you look like crap when you first met? NO...so why would you think he would want to see you look like crap now. You can fix yourself up in 10min. Take the time to do it...I promise, it'll make a difference.
- FLIRT~~When you're sitting there watching TV, wink at your husband or if you're at a restaurant, rub your legs against his or when your out in public but have a moment alone...give him a passionate kiss. It may seem silly but a man wants to feel "wanted" regardless of what you may think.
- HE DA MAN~~A man NEEDS to feel like a man. Show him some respect. Instead of telling him something...make it sound like you're asking in a way. I know this is going to be a tough one for you independent gals. Here's an example: I want to go see a good friend of mine who lives in Texas. Instead of saying "I'm going to go see my friend..I'm leaving tomorrow at 1:00" you can say "I'm thinking about going to see my friend in Texas...I was thinking about leaving around 1:00 tomorrow...What do you think?" Why do this?? It makes him feel like you respect him enough to ask what he thinks and, more importantly when he says "that sounds good", it will make him feel like HE made the decision to let you go. Kinda lame really but it works.
- BLAH, BLAH, BLAH~~Don't be so bossy (which actually goes back to he da man), quit nagging so much, don't bring up the past while arguing, and act like you are interested in whatever he's saying...even if you aren't. I think women are bossy in general, especially today's women but nobody liked the kid who was bossing everyone around so why would your man like it! For crying out-loud...quit freakin' nagging so much. Who cares if he leaves his plate on the table, his socks on the floor, or forgets to pick up that "something" you asked him to get you at the store. There are more important things in life to worry about besides piddly crap like that. Arguing can be healthy sometimes but don't go bringing up the past. It does no good and flat out just makes things worse. And it's childish. Listen to your man. I could care less about what my husband traded for with his other buddies but when he's telling me about it, I listen. Why? Because he's trying to have a conversation with me. I think, most men, by nature don't have the best communicating skills when they are talking to their woman so any conversation he tries to make is an effort and should be acknowledged.
- BEHIND CLOSED DOORS~~Hmmmmm.....I wonder what this means;) Get things started. Don't wait for your man to make all the moves. YOU take the initiative and make him feel wanted. They need that to you know. You don't have to buy lingerie either. Find a t-shirt (no, not the stained one), cut some slits in the side, and throw on some purty panties. (no, not the grandma ones either)....or not;) You can be that lady when you're around people and in public but when you get behind closed doors, make him feel glad to be a man!! That's part of song by the way:)
This is all advice from a woman who's been married for 14 1/2yrs. You can use it or not but these are a few reasons why we are still together and still very much in love.
August 2, 2007 at 4:23 PM
Good advices but don't forget that all couples are different, and each one of them seem to have their "status-quo" ! ;)
August 2, 2007 at 4:34 PM
Hey Chica~~I know that's for sure. I think I'm just old fashion and women need to be women and men need to be men...lol.
I'm surprised I haven't received any other comments from other women;)
August 2, 2007 at 9:45 PM
Well your about to be disappointed. I'm not a woman :(.
I pretty much agree with all of them. I certainly do about #5. What can I say...I'm a freak and I like my woman to have bedroom initiative. And it is way sexier if it is my t-shirt, or better yet a button down undone.
August 2, 2007 at 11:34 PM
Hey C?man~~I figured the guys would agree with it..lol. And yes, I know MY husband likes the t-shirt thing;)
August 5, 2007 at 3:32 PM
Glad it works for you. It reminds me of that story about the women that passed on the book about dog training from generation to generation.
August 8, 2007 at 5:17 PM
okay now I'm waiting for the follow up about what we are supposed to do to keep you happy??
later all and have a profitable productive blogging day
August 9, 2007 at 2:08 PM
It's posted Cman!
August 9, 2007 at 10:01 PM
I totally agree - now, I'm a newbie in marriage (well, my second..but this one is real and the other was...for another time!) but it impacts my self-esteem and his to do all those things you mentioned!
August 9, 2007 at 10:20 PM
Hey LAREN!!! Nice to "see" you!! My so called methods are a bit ol' fashioned but they work for me! Did you make HIM read Keeping your Woman Happy?...lol.
I'm glad you stopped by!! Come back and visit!
August 15, 2007 at 8:04 PM
you called them ol'fashioned, but let's think about our grandparents and previous generations, they didn't do much other than what you suggest and the majority of them were married 90% longer to one spouse than most of us will accomplish by compiling our multiple marriages -- you & rooster are quite an exception & i wish more of us could be like you guys!
August 15, 2007 at 8:10 PM
Laren~~I actually wrote a post similiar to what you are saying. It was Where is a Woman's Place. Anyhoo, I'm so glad you came back by again.
And thank you for the SUPER NICE comment about me and my man;)
August 24, 2007 at 11:19 AM
This posting made me ill. Gotta make your husband feel like he made the decision to allow you to go see your friend?? Doesn't sound like much of a man to me if that's what you're basing your advice on.
I don't believe in the LORD OF THE CASTLE and the little woman point of view. In fact, none of the women I know do either. And what a shock to find out that we all have happy, stable and long standing marriages. Who'd a thunk??!!? Of course, we all married secure, stable and decent men.
Delilah
August 24, 2007 at 11:32 AM
In response to~~~~Gotta make your husband feel like he made the decision to allow you to go see your friend?? Doesn't sound like much of a man to me if that's what you're basing your advice on.
You're missing the point. It's more of a respect issue. I would want my husband to ask me if he can go see someone and stay for a couple of days. Maybe I wouldn't want him to. It goes both ways. And I'm not saying it's HIS decision whether I go or not--I'm just saying it makes them feel more like a man if HE THINKS he influenced your decision.
It sounds like you are more of a "pant" wearer and not a "dress" wearer...so if my posts make you ill, then don't read them.
September 6, 2007 at 10:13 AM
I agree that respect is the focal point. A couple of years ago, I went on a short trip with two of my best friends from high school. We went to Canton, TX, to this gigantic flea market for which Canton is famous. We stayed at a B&B and that night sat in the hot tub catching up on each other's lives. It was a wonderful trip! When I first shared the plans for the trip with my husband, he thought it was a great idea! And his thoughts are important to me, just as my thoughts are important to him. Yes, my husband is the head of our home and I respect him for that, but he doesn't lord it over me. We have mutual respect, mutual decision making and work as a team.
September 7, 2007 at 12:33 PM
I've been married nearly as long as you and if I followed your advice, I'd be divorced. Not all couples work the way you think they do.
September 7, 2007 at 12:42 PM
Puss--Yes, I realize that and I don't believe I said ALL couples do. I merely stated some things that keep MY man happy and we do work. Thank you for your opinion and taking the time to comment.